Nelly: An ambassador for grammar and spelling in schools?

It has come to my attention that Nelly (or whoever writes his ‘songs’) cannot spell.

Some examples:

‘N Dey Sey’

‘Hot In Herre’

‘Ride Wit Me’

And the list goes on. Why do rappers (this includes R & B and hip-hop; it’s all the same anyways) feel the need to spell incorrectly? I mean, this dickhead wears a Band-Aid on his cheek!

Didn’t he release an album called ‘Country Grammar’?

I wish I could become a big rap star, and get away with spelling words incorrectly. In the world of hard rock/metal, you don’t get away with it. When they first became famous, both Korn and Limp Bizkit copped a lot of shit for the way their names were spelt. That’s right, Puddle of Mudd copped it too, but they still cop it because they lick balls.

I write my lyrics on Microsoft Word, after I’ve handwritten them. I recommend that Nelly does the same. He just might see what a tool he is, once he works out how to use the computer.

I have written a Nelly-style rap song; maybe he would like to use it?

I have also included the grammatically correct version.

In The Hizzy

Bitches in da club holla at me,
What up doc? Dey like what dey see.
Want a piece of dis? U know wat u gotta do,
Get on da floor with Big Daddy Schmoove.

Is it me, or iz it hot in herre?
All da playas come get a piece of da action right herre.
Maybe I’m bored wit my peeps and hoes,
But I’m a playa fo’ life, dat’s how it goes.

Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
I gots to get tight wit my bizzles in the hizzy!

Bitches in da club be lookin’ at me,
Somethin’ in dey eyez seys dey likes what dey see.
But I iz a playa, thru and thru,
Want a piece of dis? U know wat u gotta do.

Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
Fo’ shizzle my bizzle in the hizzy!
I gots to get tight wit my bizzles in the hizzy!

U know I luv it when u shake dat ass!

Diddy P (in the hizzy!)
Mack Pimp (in the hizzy!)
Fresh G (in the hizzy!)
Detroit (in the hizzy!)
L.A (in the hizzy!)
Compton (in the hizzy!)
N.Y.C (in the hizzy!)
Orlando (in the hizzy!)

I gots to get tight wit my bizzles in the hizzy!

In The General Vicinity

Women in the club appear to be seeking my attention,
I sense that they view me as appealing to the eye.
If you would like to win my heart, we must court first,
May I suggest a dance?

I must say, the room temperature is a tad oppressive in here.
My friends, may I suggest inviting your partners for a dance?
Maybe I’m weary of my associates,
But we have quite a close-knit social circle.

I am in agreement with the ladies in the general vicinity!
I am in agreement with the ladies in the general vicinity!
I am in agreement with the ladies in the general vicinity!
I would like to get acquainted with the ladies in the general vicinity!

Women in the club appear to be looking at me,
I sense that their facial expressions indicate a degree of curiousity.
But I am a bachelor, and maybe it’s time to find the right lady.
If you would like to win my heart, we must court first.

I am in agreement with the ladies in the general area!
I am in agreement with the ladies in the general area!
I am in agreement with the ladies in the general area!
I would like to get acquainted with the ladies in the general area!

My word, you are quite an accomplished dancer!

Interlude: (include names of associates, destinations you have visited, and destinations you would like visit)

I would like to get acquainted with the ladies in the general vicinity!

- Fridge.